Your Basic D.I.D. = Discipler in Denial

Is having the superhero complex a bad thing? I'd been wondering about it for some time now...

Superhero complex means, in my own words, the tendency (or urgency?) to save a seemingly helpless person from impending harm.

Last sem, in Social Psychology class, we had a discussion about helping. One of the points that I discussed was that people usually tend to help those whom they think need help. The implication of that is, when we don't think that a person is helpless, and/or when we think that his being in a tight situation can be attributed to his own...well, stupidity (i.e. poor choices, lack of foresight, little sense of responsibility),then we won't help.I think that's logical, yeah. But how about helping people whom we only think need help but actually don't?

In an earlier blog, I wrote some thoughts as to why I wanted to be a psychologist. I read it again earlier today, and it hit me that maybe I am guilty of having the superhero complex.

Simply saying, it's just that sometimes I feel that there's too many people who are too helpless or innocent to be exposed to, and even to experience, the wickedness of the world.

As Christians, we may call it empathy. We may see it as just genuine concern. We may look at it as goodwill.
But is it possible to maybe, just maybe, overdo being "God's special agents on earth," to the point that we become overzealous in saving other people from the snares of evil?

No, I'm not really talking about evangelism. Actually, I was thinking more along the lines of discipleship.

I just realized that it is possible for mentors to "baby" their disciples. To spoon-feed them with bite-sized Bible bits instead of letting them cut up the chunks for themselves. To strap them in a stroller and take them wherever. To keep them in a walker and let them explore, but only to a certain distance. Stuff like that. You could prolly read between and within the lines. Superhero complex in action.

Maybe it's the reason why kids nowadays are either too rash or too reserved.

:)

Nonetheless, I do recognize that mentors are there to guide and help mold us. Admittedly,I wasn't actually discipled by anybody, except, of course, my parents. But now as a discipler, I find myself wondering, "Am I doing this right? How long am I gonna let this person be dependent on me? How will I know if s/he's ready to stand on his/her own?" I'm not really looking for immediate answers, because obviously, this isn't something I can rush. (The discussion in Lead 4 class also made me think about this some more.)

I don't know if any of this makes sense. (Actually, I'm really sleepy already. LOL.) But this I say: No, I can't be a superhero. I can't even save myself from the bad things. And I'm not sure I am even worthy of being a discipler. But this I know: I want to be in the business of changing lives. For the better. With my best.

On Life: Somebody to Listen

I used to snicker at the idea of people being willing to pay a total stranger just so he/she can have somebody to talk to. Literally, bumibili sila ng kausap. I mean, who would do that? Someone really desperate and lonely, I guess. I just couldn't believe there were actually people like that.

However, when I was thinking about what course to take up in college, I realized that I want to be just that. No, not the person who's looking for someone to talk to; I have friends naman. But other people don't. And I started to feel that I want to be that somebody who'll be willing to listen. And who will listen.

That's why I took up Psychology.

Sometimes, I feel that people aren't so...responsive when I say I'm a Psych major. They're not that thrilled as they would probably be when I would have said I'm taking up Advertising or Journalism. Neither do they consider it practical as opposed to Nursing, nor as prestigious as Medicine, Engineering, or Architecture. After all, all psychologists ever do is listen to their clients rant about their life's misery and woe, right? It's like there's a stigma that says "Everybody can 'do' psychology. Why study it?"

I think most people got that wrong.

For one, not anybody can really "do" psychology. There's more to it than common sense. (Besides, what used to be common is not so anymore, actually.) I don't believe guidance counselors and HR personnel are just anybody. I like to believe that they started with the desire to help change society and the world, and they chose this field because they believe that people are worth investing in.

Now here I am in my senior year, trying to absorb as much as I can from my professors' experiences, their lectures, my textbooks, and personal research; and finding myself thinking about how I'm gonna actually put all this to use when I graduate. But then, I realized I don't have to wait for graduation or my first job to apply all these things, seeing how handy all this information could be for my ministry at church, especially with the youth.

I guess what I'm really just trying to say is that I am amazed at how God has worked in my life, allowing me to attend Messiah College, study Psychology, and experience how it is to be discipled, so that I'd be prepared to serve as a youth leader. Lately, I've felt God making my heart heavy towards helping today's youth, especially in our church, and opening my eyes to look for ways to address their needs and help them to grow and become mature, to "come out of the box," to find their niche, and to reach their full potential--in other words, be the kind of young men and women God meant for them, and all of us, to be. I count myself blessed for being granted this calling and opportunity for service.

As H. Norman Wright said, "...a counselor...is called to be a caregiver in the lives of those who come to [him] for help." Most of the time, we overlook the importance and value of helping others. But really, even the simplest gesture, like smiling to someone who passes you by or walking with an elderly crossing the street, can mean so much to others. It is my personal conviction to make the world a better place, in whatever way I can. And I believe being a psychologist would make me equipped to do that.

Even if I am not a licensed counselor yet (and God-willing I will be in the near future), I believe that God will use me to help change the world...

...even simply through being somebody to listen.